Choosing Your Death

In the New Testament of the Christian Bible, Matthew 24 warns that no one knows the day or hour of his death. However, some spiritual teachers and researchers who study reincarnation tell us that we choose our lifetimes on earth as well as the conditions of our physical existences. We also choose when and how we depart from earth, to return to our true home in the spirit world.

Going Home

Although many of us fear and dread physical death, everything I’ve witnessed and read indicates that we have nothing to worry about. Brian L. Weiss, MD, in his book Many Lives, Many Masters, writes, “To be in physical state is abnormal. When you are in spiritual state, that is natural to you.” People who’ve had near-death experiences generally say life outside the human body is a whole lot better than it is here on earth. Dr. Piero Calvi-Parisetti’s course Love Knows No Death includes a video module of many people who’ve had NDEs; all described similar and wondrous experiences.

If you’re someone who can communicate with spirits in the nonphysical realm, you’ve likely heard them say they’re happy where they are now. In his book Journey of Souls, Michael Newton, PhD, reports that clients he has regressed through their prior deaths usually say something like: “Oh, wonderful, I’m home in this beautiful place again” or “I’m relieved to be away from Earth.” My long-time partner, Ron Conroy, who left his body in 2013, tells me often how much happier and more peaceful he is now. “What we call the ‘other world’ is the real one,” he explains, “earth is an illusion.”

Leaving Our Lives

Some might interpret this as a reason for suicide, even though some religions insist that suicide is a sin. As I understand it, however, our teachers, guides, and spirits don’t judge or punish us––they welcome everyone, including suicides, back home. But people who decide to end their physical lives early will still have to complete the lessons they skipped out on, during another earthly incarnation.

After his physical death, Ron told me that even if we go quickly (as he did, from a stroke) we’ve actually made the decision much earlier. “We leave in stages, gradually detaching from the physical world,” he explained. Nine months before he passed, he told a mutual friend of ours that he wanted to die of a stroke before his seventieth birthday––which is exactly what happened. He picked the moment and method for his departure, not through suicide, but through intention.

Why, then, would anyone choose a painful or gruesome death? When I asked Ron this question, he replied that some souls accept terminal illnesses, such as cancer, to give doctors a chance to study the disease and learn ways to help other people. In some instances, souls decide that their host bodies will die in traumatic ways in order to raise awareness of a situation or to inspire interest in a particular cause. This may be true of warrior souls who die in battle. Undoubtedly, numerous other reasons exist, perhaps as many as the individuals involved.

If it’s any comfort, Dr. Newton writes in Destiny of Souls that “souls often leave their bodies seconds before a violent death.” And if we really do reincarnate on earth many, many times, then we’ve all gone through numerous deaths––and survived.

Why Did You Choose This Life?

Past-life researchers and people who believe in reincarnation propose that we choose our lifetimes on earth for specific purposes. We select our parents and families, the physical bodies we’ll inhabit, the cultures in which we will live, the timeframe during which we’ll exist, and the challenges we’ll face. Astrologers say that we also look at celestial configurations to determine what combination of energies will offer us the best potential for achieving our goals. I’ve read that although the individual soul gets to make the final decision, our guides and teachers offer suggestions and assist us in making these important choices.

Why Pick a Hard Life?

If that’s so, you may ask, why would anyone choose a lifetime of hardship, pain, illness, poverty, or suffering? The usual answer is: to learn, and some things must be learned the hard way. Another theory states that we take on onerous conditions in a particular incarnation in order to atone for past misdeeds. In his book Miracles Happen, Brian Weiss, MD writes that a soul may enter a body that has more than the usual limitations in order to learn to receive from others, to be cared for––especially if that soul has served as a caregiver in many lifetimes. 

It seems to me that as evolving souls who will eventually become spirit guides ourselves, overseeing the human race, we may need to experience everything that morals undergo, so we can understand and assist them in their earthly journey. If you’ve never suffered the loss of a loved one, for instance, you might not know how to ease another’s grief.

Reasons for Incarnating

In my earlier posts, I’ve suggested that we incarnate for other reasons too: to be with members of our soul group who’ve already entered human forms; to work on relationships that we began in previous lifetimes; to create in the manifest world; to inspire or implement changes on Planet Earth. Most importantly, we come here to bring love from our divine “home” into the physical realm.

As I wrote in my previous post “What’s Your Life Purpose?” your lifetimes are based on certain themes. Soul roles fall into various categories, such as teacher, healer, warrior, leader, etc. Therefore, you’ll integrate your soul’s primary purpose into each incarnation, even though the details will differ. If you’re a warrior soul, for example, you might have been a gladiator in Ancient Rome, a soldier during the French Revolution, and a football player today.

My post “What Color Is Your Soul” discusses soul colors as indicators of spiritual knowledge and development. During visits to the spirit world, I saw multitudes of white souls (beginners), but very few purple ones (masters). This idea is reiterated in the books of Michael Newton, PhD, Journey of Souls and Destiny of Souls. As my partner, Ron Conroy, who left the physical world in 2013, explained it to me, the younger white souls often enter lifetimes where they can learn basic survival skills and practice adapting to the requirements of earthly embodiment. These souls may not have spent much time on this planet and must develop their “earth legs” before they can help others. People who live relatively primitive or very simple existences, in which they have few responsibilities other than sustaining themselves, may fall into this group.

Souls who’ve graduated to higher levels (yellow, gold, green), perhaps through many lifetimes on earth, face a different set of challenges and opportunities. They may choose incarnations in which they must consider and/or take care of others as well as themselves. Perhaps they’ll share what they’ve learned with other beings. Or, they may assume responsibility for other humans, animals, plants, etc., protecting or guiding these entities in their own growth. More developed souls may bring knowledge to earth’s inhabitants, provide support or employment to others, create products that make physical existence easier, defend communities in times of crisis, etc.

Eventually, we accomplish our earth “lessons” and reach a high enough level of spiritual development where we no longer need to incarnate. As blue or purple souls, we may choose to operate from a nonphysical realm instead of taking on human bodies. I suspect levels far beyond this exist, but I can’t speak to that––yet.

Soul Groups

After my long-time partner, Ron Conroy, left his physical form in April 2013, he began communicating with me about the place where he now resides, a place he calls “home,” and showing me what it’s like in the spirit world. What he described, and what I witnessed, closely matched what I later read in books by Michael Newton, PhD. Even the use of Ron's word “home” to describe the spirit realm we return to after physical death is echoed in the accounts of people who’ve undergone near death experiences, shown in a video module of Dr. Piero Calvi-Parisetti’s course Love Knows No Death.

Primary and Secondary Soul Groups

In the realm of spirits, entities cluster together in groups in which some affinity exists––just as people on earth do. Not all souls associate with all others––though they could if they wanted to because ultimately none of us is an island separate from the rest. But souls in the spirit world, as we earthlings do, tend to hang out with beings who have similar interests or purposes.

In his book Destiny of Souls, Dr. Newton writes that “primary groups”––somewhat like families––consist of three to twenty-five souls who have close ties to each other. “Secondary groups” may contain 1,000 souls or more and resemble communities. The souls in these larger clusters may interact for various reasons, such as joining forces to assist in a particular project or to achieve a common goal.

Souls in primary clusters are bonded forever. They work, learn, and play together in the spirit world, and often reincarnate together on earth or in other places. They do this partly because their paths and purposes are aligned, but also because they just want to be together. According to Dr. Newton, soul mates and beings from the same primary soul group don’t usually incarnate as humans within the same biological family, however, which I found interesting.

Ron explained that primary soul groups may be self-contained circles, or they can overlap, like the intersecting rings of the Olympics logo. He said this means that although he and I are in the same primary soul cluster, some beings in other clusters overlap ours. As a result, some souls who are in my primary group aren’t in his, and vice versa.  

As well as sharing related interests and purposes, beings within a primary group usually possess similar levels of knowledge. Beginner souls and master souls don’t cluster together in the same intimate group––although souls with varying degrees of knowledge may interact at times for certain reasons. I also got the impression that as one soul in the group advances, the soul’s increased knowledge and experience aid the advancement of the entire group.

While looking at pictures of crop circles, I noticed a similarity to the soul clusters I’d seen in the spirit world and began to wonder. Are these mysterious designs, which appear without explanation in fields across the earth, actually images created to help us understand something about our existence as spirits?

Meeting Our Soul-Group Mates

Often we recognize people we know now as people we’ve known before. Individuals who undergo past-life regression frequently describe meeting the same souls in lifetime after lifetime. A son in this incarnation may have been a husband or a brother in a previous one. Many writers and researchers in the field of reincarnation have talked about this, and I’ll discuss it more in future posts.

Think about the people you know and have known during this incarnation. These may be friends, relatives, business colleagues, powerful influences in your life, teachers, helpers, or adversaries. Which ones do you consider the most important? What roles have they played for you? Did you feel a powerful connection to these people when you first met, as if you’d known each other forever? Does a person push your buttons? Did you meet under synchronistic circumstances? For example, I met Ron fifteen minutes after saying goodbye to a former boyfriend at the local train station. Driving home, I said “Okay, Goddess, what do you have for me now?” As I pulled into my driveway Ron rode by on his bicycle. He turned around, pedaled up to me, and introduced himself. We were together for the rest of his physical life––and still are.

Are you aware of people in your current life whom you feel you’ve known before? What insights or experiences have led you to think this way? How do you interpret your present-life interactions with these people? Can you see links between “then” and “now”? What are you learning from each other? Are you carrying on work from another lifetime? How can you help one another this time around?

Welcome to My New Blog about the Afterlife

On April 4, 2013, my life fell apart after the sudden, unexpected passing of the man I’d loved for thirteen years, Ron Conroy. I know many of you have experienced the same sort of devastating upheaval when someone you loved left the physical realm. However, in the midst of my grief, I received an unanticipated gift: the opportunity to explore the world beyond. It is my privilege and intent to share these experiences with you, and to provide a place for you to share your experiences with others.

Every day since Ron left this plane of existence, he has communicated with me from the so-called "Other Side," which he refers to simply as "home." (Those of you who knew him may find this odd, because he was hardly a spiritual or “woo-woo” person while on earth.) What he told me and showed me totally transformed my ideas about what happens after we leave Planet Earth––and prompted me to read books by numerous researchers in the field. To my surprise, many things I read concurred with what Ron had shared with me. I'd never heard most of this before, but just knowing that other people had similar experiences gave me comfort and confirmation.

All You Need Is Love 

All of us have wondered what happens when we die and why we came to earth in the first place. In the past three years, I've received answers to those and other big questions. Some of the answers surprised me. For instance, I’d always believed we incarnated on this planet to learn––and that’s true, but it’s not the primary reason. Even more important is the desire to bring love into a world filled with hardship. 

In our true "home" love is omnipresent. We carry some of that amazing love with us, in the form of energy, when we assume physical bodies here on earth. Our job is to radiate that love to everyone, everywhere, in everything we do. In this way, we overcome the force of fear that dominates earth-thinking and expresses itself in so many hurtful ways. Only two forces exist in the universe: love and fear. Each moment, we have the choice to operate from a place of love or a place of fear. It's that simple––and that difficult.

As I write on this blog, my objective is to lighten your fear and sadness. If I can do this in even the smallest way, I will feel I've accomplished my goal. The old Beatles' song says it best: "All You Need Is Love."

The Three Wounds of Wisdom: The Book

I’m a writer, and I’ve authored nearly forty books thus far, many about metaphysical subjects. So, naturally, I decided the best way I could share the insights conveyed to me was to write a book about what I'd learned. I titled it The Three Wounds of Wisdom. At first I considered writing a nonfiction book or a memoir, but many people have already done that, most of them MDs, PhDs, and folks with more "credentials" than I have. I also believe that sometimes it's easier to present unusual or thought-provoking ideas as fiction, so readers don't feel the author is trying to convince them of something. In my novel, I changed the characters, the storyline, the location, and lots more––but all the information about what transpires between our lives on earth and elsewhere came through to me during meditative trances, shamanic journeying, and other experiences with Ron since he's moved on. My wonderful agent, Paula Munier, is talking with publishers about the book now; I hope it will find a good home and be available to readers soon.

My goal is to help those of you who've suffered the pain of losing someone you love and to give you hope. I also want to open a forum for people who've communicated with departed loved ones, had near-death experiences, recalled past-lives, witnessed ghostly visitations, and other related awarenesses. Please feel free to comment here, and to suggest resources you think will be useful to readers.