Communicating with Spirits

Has someone you knew on earth contacted you from the “other side”? If so, you’re not alone. According to Canadian sociology professor Ian Currie, “contact with the dead is not rare. It is, in fact, commonplace.” In his book You Cannot Die, Dr. Currie reported numerous studies of people who said they’d been in touch with deceased loved ones. In one, psychologist Dr. Robert Kastenbaum at Wayne State University in Detroit asked 140 people if they’d experienced this type of otherworldly communication; 45 percent answered yes. In another study in Wales, Dr. W.D. Rees asked 300 widows and widowers the same thing––and got a similar response: 47 percent said their departed spouses had contacted them. So did The University of Chicago’s National Opinion Research Council; 78 percent of the bereaved individuals said they saw, 50 percent heard, and 18 percent talked with their departed loved ones.

Rather than being scared, most people welcome such “visits” and feel comforted knowing that their loved ones aren’t really gone. Soon after my life partner, Ron Conroy, left his physical body in April 2013, he began talking to me, reassuring me that he was all right and happy now that he’d returned “home.” Since then, he has continued to share fascinating information with me daily about other worlds of experience, what happens in the life of a soul, the purpose of incarnation on earth, and much more.

Why Do Spirits Contact Us?

Spirits contact us for a variety of reasons. Often, disembodied beings want to console the people they loved on earth and let us know they’re okay. They also show up to assure us that they still love us, they are with us all the time, and that we can talk to them whenever we choose. In some instances, these soul entities come to take care of unfinished business, or to bring messages to us from the world beyond. They may offer guidance and protection to mortals, and help us in our own journeys during this lifetime. One reason Ron stays in constant contact with me is to collaborate on our book, The Three Wounds of Wisdom. We both hope that the book––and these posts about the afterlife––will ease the grief experienced by people like me whose loved ones have entered the spirit world, and diminish the fear of death that causes suffering for so many humans.

According to many researchers, beings on the “other side” really want to talk to us––and they go to great lengths to get us to pay attention to them. Often we meet our loved ones in dreams, because when we’re asleep we’re more receptive to the spirit realm. They also contact us through epiphanies and coincidences. Sometimes they present themselves as scents or sounds, such as tinkling bells, familiar perfumes, or music. They may even communicate through meaningful symbols. Once Ron placed a tumbled piece of rose quartz at my feet––a crystal that represents love and emotional peace. Spirits also may move objects, make noises, fiddle with electrical/mechanical equipment, or even show themselves to us.

How Can You Communicate with Spirits?

How can you communicate with entities in the nonphysical realm? Talk to them, just as you would if they were still embodied. Send thoughts to them. Offer them prayers. Pay attention to your dreams. Meditate. A tarot reading or even a Ouija board may provide insights.

The holiday Samhain Eve (October 31) honors those who’ve gone on to other realms. This is an ideal time to try to connect with loved ones in the soul world, for the veil between the physical and nonphysical realms is thinnest on this evening. Light candles in memory of those you wish to contact. Gaze into the flames. Then be still and listen.

Will You See Your Loved Ones Again?

The idea that some part of us survives physical death exists in many religions and in the belief systems of many people around the world. Christians, for instance, propose that after the body dies the soul goes to “heaven,” where it meets up again with the souls of loved ones and enjoys everlasting life with God. Lots of spiritual traditions embrace the concept of reincarnation, although they don’t all agree on exactly what’s involved. Prior to the year 325, the Old and New Testaments of the Bible contained references to reincarnation––until the Emperor Constantine decided to remove them; in 553, the Second Council of Constantinople made it heretical for Christians to believe in reincarnation. Reincarnation is also part of the teachings of the Hebrew Qabalah, though contemporary Jews may not be familiar with these ideas. We find the tenets of reincarnation in Hinduism and Buddhism too.

Reincarnation Research

Researchers, including Ian Stevenson, MD, Brian L. Weiss, MD, Michael Newton, PhD, Raymond Moody, MD, and many more, have studied reincarnation by guiding thousands of people back through previous lifetimes and by working with men and women who’ve had near-death experiences. Their case studies reveal remarkable information about other time periods and people the subjects could not have known about through ordinary channels. The case of Bridey Murphy, a Virginia housewife (1923–1995), is one of the best known. Director Bernardo Bertolucci’s film Little Buddha tells the story of a young boy whom Buddhist monks believed to be the reincarnated teacher Lama Dorje. You’ll find scores of compelling stories in the books of serious researchers, stories that cannot be explained by conventional science––so many, in fact, that after a while it becomes more ridiculous to deny the possibility of reincarnation than to accept it.

Children often speak of their past lives. Sometimes they recognize people they’ve never met this time around and know intimate details about those people. In the summer of 2013, I met a three-year-old boy who took an instant liking to me and showed me around the house where he was staying. He told me his name was Will. After we finished the tour, I met the boy’s parents and commented on what a nice boy Will seemed. They told me his name was Sami. Later, I asked the boy why he’d said his name was Will. He answered simply, “In my old body I was Will.”

Past, Present, and Future Relationships

Theories about reincarnation generally agree that we reconnect with some of the same souls again and again in our various earth lives. We don’t always assume the same types of relationships with them, however. In prior lifetimes, your current spouse may have been your mother, your brother, or your best friend. (In future posts, I’ll discuss this subject in more detail.) In his book Many Lives, Many Masters, Dr. Brian Weiss explains that one reason for becoming human is to experience relationships with other people. He writes, “ ‘You develop through relationships.’ ” Often, we choose to live many times with the same entities in order to learn certain things or to perform certain tasks. Other times, we may return to earth at the same time because we like being together. If you find yourself in a particularly close, intense, or meaningful relationship with someone now, chances are you’ve known each other before––and will be together again. 

Where Do We Go When We Die?

Christians have their Heaven; Buddhists speak of Nirvana; Wiccans go to the Summerland when their earthly lives end. Many people who’ve had near-death experiences (NDEs) report being drawn through a dark tunnel toward a radiant light, emerging in a place where they feel suffused with love and joy. Their deceased friends and relatives, they say, greet them when they arrive in the hereafter, welcoming them back to their place of origin. Spirit guides also show up to usher the recently departed souls into a place of peace after their sojourns on earth. Virtually everyone who’s ever undergone a NDE or been regressed/hypnotized through a prior death describes pretty much the same thing––and what they describe sounds wonderful.

Going Home

Soon after my long-time partner, Ron Conroy, left his physical form in April of 2013, he began telling me about his experiences in the “world beyond.” He calls this place “home” because it’s the energetic realm where souls originate and where they return between lifetimes on earth (or other worlds, which I’ll discuss in future posts). Here, everything is made of light and resonance––nothing is physical. No longer encumbered by dense human bodies, souls feel a delicious sense of freedom. They can move about without restriction, communicate with one another via thoughts, and create whatever they choose instantaneously just by envisioning it.

A beautiful web of pink light envelops all beings here and holds them together in a cosmic “hug.” This light of love unifies everyone through resonance, and reassures souls that no one is ever alone––we only experience fear and loneliness when we are separated into physical forms. In reality, we are all part of an infinite, loving, joyful network that has always existed and always will. When we realize that we all come from the same Source and are all linked energetically––that every being is part of the whole––racism, sexism, religious disputes, and other ego dynamics that divide us on earth quickly disappear after our bodies die.

Cosmic Consciousness

In the late 1980s, I experienced a metaphysical occurrence that Canadian psychiatrist William Bucke called “cosmic consciousness.” Without intention, without doing anything at all to bring it about, I suddenly and inexplicably slipped into an altered state during which I felt myself dissolve into a realm of pure bliss. I lost all awareness of my body and merged with a beautiful, all-encompassing, infinite pink-white light. Everything in my earth-world disappeared. I felt totally immersed in a loving consciousness unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. All suffering, fear, time, and thinking evaporated. I have no idea how long that event lasted. Seconds? A few minutes? But it was enough to transform my understanding forever.

Much later, after Ron’s passing, I realized that in those few moments I’d reconnected with my place of origin, my “home.” This is where we go when we slough off our moral forms and soar back to the realm of love and light from which we emerged and where we will ever abide. This is the home that awaits us when we depart earth.

You Are Eternal

Knowing that this wondrous world now embraces our deceased loved ones can ease the pain of loss. But perhaps even more importantly, this knowledge can lessen our own fear of death. Regardless of what we’ve been taught about the hereafter––and many of us have been taught to fear retribution and suffering, hellfire and damnation––our real destination is a realm of infinite love and peace.

It makes no difference what “savior” you believed in, what faith you followed (or none), or what rituals you’ve enacted. No one gets turned away from the so-called Pearly Gates. The people we loved on earth who’ve gone on before us are reveling in that blissful state right now––and they’ll be there to welcome us back when our time comes. So will our guides and guardians, who’ve been with us since the beginning of time and will remain by our sides, watching over us forever.

You are eternal, and so is everyone else now on earth. Your soul, your spirit form, the essence of who you are and will ever be, is indestructible. As author C. S. Lewis so succinctly explained it, “You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.”

Welcome to My New Blog about the Afterlife

On April 4, 2013, my life fell apart after the sudden, unexpected passing of the man I’d loved for thirteen years, Ron Conroy. I know many of you have experienced the same sort of devastating upheaval when someone you loved left the physical realm. However, in the midst of my grief, I received an unanticipated gift: the opportunity to explore the world beyond. It is my privilege and intent to share these experiences with you, and to provide a place for you to share your experiences with others.

Every day since Ron left this plane of existence, he has communicated with me from the so-called "Other Side," which he refers to simply as "home." (Those of you who knew him may find this odd, because he was hardly a spiritual or “woo-woo” person while on earth.) What he told me and showed me totally transformed my ideas about what happens after we leave Planet Earth––and prompted me to read books by numerous researchers in the field. To my surprise, many things I read concurred with what Ron had shared with me. I'd never heard most of this before, but just knowing that other people had similar experiences gave me comfort and confirmation.

All You Need Is Love 

All of us have wondered what happens when we die and why we came to earth in the first place. In the past three years, I've received answers to those and other big questions. Some of the answers surprised me. For instance, I’d always believed we incarnated on this planet to learn––and that’s true, but it’s not the primary reason. Even more important is the desire to bring love into a world filled with hardship. 

In our true "home" love is omnipresent. We carry some of that amazing love with us, in the form of energy, when we assume physical bodies here on earth. Our job is to radiate that love to everyone, everywhere, in everything we do. In this way, we overcome the force of fear that dominates earth-thinking and expresses itself in so many hurtful ways. Only two forces exist in the universe: love and fear. Each moment, we have the choice to operate from a place of love or a place of fear. It's that simple––and that difficult.

As I write on this blog, my objective is to lighten your fear and sadness. If I can do this in even the smallest way, I will feel I've accomplished my goal. The old Beatles' song says it best: "All You Need Is Love."

The Three Wounds of Wisdom: The Book

I’m a writer, and I’ve authored nearly forty books thus far, many about metaphysical subjects. So, naturally, I decided the best way I could share the insights conveyed to me was to write a book about what I'd learned. I titled it The Three Wounds of Wisdom. At first I considered writing a nonfiction book or a memoir, but many people have already done that, most of them MDs, PhDs, and folks with more "credentials" than I have. I also believe that sometimes it's easier to present unusual or thought-provoking ideas as fiction, so readers don't feel the author is trying to convince them of something. In my novel, I changed the characters, the storyline, the location, and lots more––but all the information about what transpires between our lives on earth and elsewhere came through to me during meditative trances, shamanic journeying, and other experiences with Ron since he's moved on. My wonderful agent, Paula Munier, is talking with publishers about the book now; I hope it will find a good home and be available to readers soon.

My goal is to help those of you who've suffered the pain of losing someone you love and to give you hope. I also want to open a forum for people who've communicated with departed loved ones, had near-death experiences, recalled past-lives, witnessed ghostly visitations, and other related awarenesses. Please feel free to comment here, and to suggest resources you think will be useful to readers.